Friday, June 29, 2012

Telestial, A 100-Word Anthropology Lesson by Ilyan Kei Lavanway

Raspberry Photo Prompt for Madison Woods Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Flash Fiction June 29, 2012, This image of raspberries is the photo prompt for June 29, 2012 Madison Woods Friday Fictioneers 100-word flash fiction writing challenge. My story is titled Telestial, and is posted on wordpress at the URL

I own the bragging rights to the best 100-word anthropology lesson ever offered. Click the image above to visit the original post at and see the blog comments there for elaboration.

Here is the story.

Eve, the first to become mortal, remained inert until Adam followed suit. Adam’s mortal secretions were mutually reactive with Eve’s.

Mortality spread across the planet, becoming the first 100-percent lethal pandemic to effect every living organism on Earth. Within one millennium, physical death became a ubiquitous attribute.

Mortal life brought with it the capacity to procreate. Man, animal, and plant life began to multiply, producing offspring of their own kind, in their own image.

Earth descended from its Terrestrial estate, becoming a Telestial world for the next six thousand years. Welcome to the twilight of the sixth millennium. What’s next?

Thursday, June 28, 2012

American Muslims Stone Christians in Dearborn Michigan, showing what Real Change Looks Like

Yes, Mr. Obama, this is what real change looks like. And you are correct. It is because of what we, the voters, did in 2008.

Documentary DVD Dreams of My Real Father Deepens Obama Birth Record Conspiracy

Plausible deniability. Kenya and Barack Obama, Senior. Hawaii and Frank Marshall Davis. Stanley Ann Dunham in Hawaii or Washington State. Which is it? Perhaps it is none of these. Is Ann Dunham really Barack Hussein Obama's mother? Is the attention over the identity of Obama's real father a divisive smokescreen to cover the identity of his real mother? Maybe that's up next.

Perhaps it is the Obama camp that is actually behind the release of these conflicting evidences. The plot would be to sensationalize unresolved issues, draw investigations away from more pressing matters, and make conservatives believe it is a conservative movement that is exposing new information. It is possible that all of this is an Obama plan to confuse and divide conservatives, all the while concealing an even more disturbing set of facts that that have eluded even the keenest of sleuths.

Obama worshipers still worship Obama. Yet conservatives have not been united among themselves on the issues and facts and evidence against him. Conservatives do agree on one fundamental imperative, however. Regardless of who he is or from whence he came, Obama must be defeated.

There are few if any accidents in politics. Everything is calculated and exploited to some end, be it good or evil. And it should go without saying that in Obama's case, everything is undiluted evil.

On this continent, from about the year 2000 BC until AD 421, prophets had warned various groups of pilgrims that had migrated here from the Tower of Babel and later from Jerusalem that any people who possess this land must remain faithful to God or be destroyed. At least two of the civilizations that grew from these ancient pilgrims were wiped out. And not entirely by plagues or natural disasters. Liberal politics and the associated rise of secret combinations utterly destroyed two great societies from off the face of the land we now inhabit. The warning still stands.

If we the people continue to tolerate homosexual behavior, abortion, big government, entitlement mindsets, and the removal of Christ from our culture, just to name a few, what do you think is going to happen?

Two ancient civilizations inhabited this land between about the year 590 BC and AD 421. They originally settled here as one group. Early in their history, there was a falling out between some of the brothers. A splinter group broke off and became known as Lamanites. The main group called themselves Nephites. The Nephites initially remained faithful to God, but were warned that if they would forget God, the Lamanites would become a scourge and a threat of destruction to the Nephites. Guess what. By the year AD 421, there was one known Nephite left alive. His name was Moroni.

The point is, Obama is part of a progressive scourge that we, as a nation, have brought upon ourselves by what we have fostered in our sociopolitical affairs. So the question becomes, are we as a nation going to rid ourselves of this foul scourge through renewed faithfulness to God, or are we going to descend the slimy slopes of liberalism until our downward inertia becomes irreversible and we end up in hell, where you can have your own personal Islamic extremist to torture you while Satan and Obama laugh and high-five each other.

Perhaps the entire Obama birth record issue is a cleverly orchestrated social engineering project designed by Obama's handlers and financiers dating back to his infancy, or perhaps even pre-dating his conception. The quintessential exploitation of a child born of plausibly deniable heritage among the secretive circles of Communism and Islamic extremist influences, all bent on world domination.

Perhaps by design, perhaps by convenient coincidence, Ann Dunham is impregnated while popular among influential communist ideologues that have ties to wealthy Arab benefactors who see the potential of their investment decades in advance. Strategic point of interest, the White House.

Grab the White House by staging a prolonged series of non-military endeavors within the American sociopolitical sphere. Mask and catalyze the project with carefully timed and deliberately provoked military conflicts overseas. Groom and fund a purposefully conceived child or exploit the convenient birth of an accidentally conceived child to become the ultimate secret weapon. Maintain his obscurity. Cloak him in mystery.

Conjure dark arts and employ the secret oaths of the Gadianton robbers to access the foresight needed to carry out the diabolical conspiracy. Make it span decades, even generations, because there is nothing like the passage of time to muddle the facts.

Engineer the freedom-loving American denizens into a spiraling conundrum, all the while carefully leading them with flaxen cords of entitlements, health-destroying lifestyles, and moral relativism. Lure them away from independence, personal integrity, self reliance, and moral fortitude. Entice them toward social programs and government dependency. Confuse and confound them with information overload and conflicting indoctrination.

When just enough of them are sufficiently ripe, desperate for change at any cost, ready to embrace the new face and the fresh approach and the cunning words designed to placate their fears and lull their minds, enter your political prodigy with an alias that captures ubiquitous attention. Hide his past. Cover his tacks. Conceal his history. He will cooperate. He covets what you are peddling. You have got America and soon the entire planet by the balls.

So the plot thickens. Here I was thinking Obama was born in Kenya, and it turns out he may have been born in Hawaii after all. However, his birth certificate is still a fabrication, a fraud, an image manipulation, and a social engineering exercise.

Interestingly, the reasons behind Obama's desperate efforts to conceal his birth records from the public may have less to do with where he was born and more to do with who his parents are, or are not. There are game changing facts he does not want you to discover, and he will do anything to cover them up and bait public attention toward various other distractions and issues. For all his narcissism, Obama probably does not care what you think about him, as long as you do not know the truth about him, and as long as your efforts to expose his lies can be chocked up as right-wing rhetoric.

One thing is sure. Obama is lying about his past. Period. By their fruits ye shall know them. Anyone with a lick of sense can see the fruits of Obama's policies and ideologies. He is hellbent on the downfall of liberty and the exaltation of his own image in the public eye. His quest for glory and power transcend borders. Obviously. He has no regard for America's borders or sovereignty, and he aspires to be heralded and revered throughout the world.

Copy of a prepared speech seen during Michele Bachmann response to June 28, 2012 Obamacare ruling, June 28, 2012 becomes a day of infamy as the supreme court upholds Obamacare as a tax and plunges America into poverty. Congress did nothing to stop this. That means there are no political checks and balances left in America.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Nuclear Powered Domestic Surveillance and Attack Drones to Swarm U.S. Skies by 2020

The above YouTube video titled Killer Drones Coming to a Sky Near You from Alex Jones features an interview with Rosalind Peterson from the Agriculture Defense Coalition. The video indicates that Obama is more of a war monger than any previous occupant of the White House.

For all his campaigning about a better world, and for all his worshipers who foolishly believe he is actually good for America, Obama continues to proliferate a political climate more volatile and unstable than nitroglycerin. He is a catalyst for World War Three and the Battle of Armageddon and all their collateral fallout. Lobbyists and Congress are doing this, not just Obama. Things are not getting better, people. Obama is not helping America. He never has, and he never will. Get your heads out of the sand and look around.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Just Launched, Lavanimal 2012 Pre-election Collection of Anti-Obama Bumper Stickers

Hope in Chains anti-Obama political bumper sticker, New controversial political bumper sticker design from Lavanimal's 2012 Pre-election Colletion

Just launched. The Lavanimal 2102 Pre-election Collection, a set of unique, rare, highly controversial, limited edition collectible Anti Obama Bumper Stickers sure to give liberals fits. Get some!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Obama Hypocrisy Unfolds in Uganda Oil War Disguised as Stand Against LRA Christian Cult

Uganda Lake Albert Basin Oil Fields Map showing Tullow Oil Company Blocks, This map is featured in the Conspiracy Theories and Paranormal Phenomena blog article titled Obama Hypocrisy Unfolds in Uganda Oil War Disguised as Stand Against LRA Christian Cult, posted June 19, 2012 at the URL

Uganda Map, This map of Uganda is shown in the article titled Obama Hypocrisy Unfolds in Uganda Oil War Disguised as Stand Against LRA Christian Cult, posted June 19, 2012 on Conspiracy Theories and Paranormal Phenomena at URL

This article is inspired by commenter Paul Cha, a true American who served his country and sees through Obama's lies. Paul brought this news to my attention, and I am thankful that he did. See Paul's comments on The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy.

Many accuse President George W. Bush of going to war over oil. Obama has done the same thing.

On top of committing direct and ongoing economic terrorism against America and indirectly against the entire global financial system that is significantly shackled by the Obama-fueled American debt crisis, Barack Hussein Obama has initiated a secret war to stake claim on oil in the African nation of Uganda. Sooner or later, corrupt secrets come out of the closet.

Liberals are quick to accuse Bush of going to war over oil in Iraq and Afghanistan under the guise of fighting terrorism, yet they say nothing when Obama goes to war for oil in Uganda under the guise of quelling human rights violations committed by an extremist Christian cult militia, the Lord’s Resistance Army, LRA, and ringleader Joseph Kony.

Obviously, Obama had no plans to keep his 2008 campaign promises to end the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and bring our troops home in, what was it, 16 months. Obama never intended to win the wars. He simply touted promises to end them.

Obama never emphasized bringing our troops home victorious. He does not want American victory. He wants his own political expediency. So, he adds his own little war in Uganda that few have heard about until recently. The timing of this war conveniently follows the discovery of a major oil reserve in Northern Uganda's Lake Albert basin.

All the while, Obama wantonly abandons America's once fundamental practice of striving to maintain sufficient military strength to simultaneously engage two major regional contingencies, MRCs. America is not presently capable of effectively waging war in more than one theater. Our enemies know it. China and Iran are counting on it. So is North Korea. So is Obama.

A side note bears mentioning. The Obama war in Uganda sheds light on Christian extremism, not Islamic extremism. It is well known that Obama opposes Christianity and embraces Islam. The collateral effects of a conflict that steers negative attention away from Muslim extremists and incites outcry against Christian extremists conveniently serves the Obama agenda. I am not advocating extremism in any religion or culture. I am simply making an observation.

More insidiously, Obama’s mobilization against a Christian cult, whatever the reasons, may demonstrate to his Muslim brothers that he is willing to wage actual war against the Infidels. Shedding Christian blood, he hopes, will garner Muslim support and at the same time remain cloaked from Christian scrutiny since, first, not many people even know about this, and second, no true Christian would advocate allowing LRA cult atrocities to continue. When good Christians hear of Obama’s apparent stand against the LRA cult in Uganda, they will be tempted to revere Obama and guzzle more of his Kool-Aid rather than look deeper into his satanic motives.

For more background on the Lake Albert, Uganda oil conflict, read the November 8, 2011 article by Steve Horn titled Has Obama Just Kicked Off Another Oil War -- This Time in Africa?

This article gives great background information on the roles of Blackwater, now called Xe Services, and other private military corporations, or PMCs. The article educates readers on the function of a production sharing agreement, PSA, and the unusual nature of the PSA drawn up between the Ugandan government and a British company, Tullow Oil, and a Canadian company, Heritage Oil, back in October of 2006.

Suspiciously, Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni created an Oil Wells Protection Unit, OWPU as his own mercenary force to police the petroleum resources and activities around Lake Albert. Museveni’s OWPU conspicuously lacks a defined chain of command and operations policies. This deliberate vagueness unleashes the OWPU for any number of ulterior missions that could be executed with no accountability. Sounds like Obama.

October 14, 2011, Obama announced a deployment of 100 Joint Special Operations Command, JSOC troops to Uganda. The mission, on paper anyway, is to remove LRA leader Joseph Kony from the arena. Not that doing so makes anything better, given that Yoweri Museveni is just as bad as Joseph Kony.

At the end of the day, Obama is only seeking to advance his own brand of dictatorship in the once free West while posturing himself for a pinnacle seat in the impending New World Order. Why else would he have been so interested in reading The Post American World?

On the playground of world politics, one bully allied with another bully to knock down a third bully is still a massive Charlie Foxtrot in which impoverished kids are the ones getting screwed, both figuratively and literally.

Obama is exploiting the ambiguity surrounding Museveni and the PSA and the OWPU. I would not be surprised if news comes out that Obama was involved in setting up the whole scenario from the start. It has the Obama signature modus operandi all over it.

Almost a year later, in spite of Obama preaching transparency in government, we still have no results disclosed.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Author Ilyan Kei Lavanway offering Free eBook Coupon Codes at Smashwords Premium Catalog

From now until July 31, 2012, I am offering the following coupon codes for Free eBooks which I have published in multiple popular eBook formats. These recently released titles are available in the Smashwords Premium Catalog. You can copy and paste or type the coupon codes into the appropriate field during checkout.

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The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy

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Out of the Picture and Into the Picture

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Post Omerican Easter

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Platypus Boy on the Duck Farm

Monday, June 11, 2012

Free eBook Coupon Code YF32T at Smashwords for The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy

The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy front cover image 72 dpi 300 pixels wide, The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy eBook by Ilyan Kei Lavanway is available in multiple e-formats including epub, kindle (.mobi), Sony Reader (LRF), Palm Doc (PDB), PDF, RTF, and Plain Text on

For a limited time, I am offering a coupon for a free eBook copy of the short story, The Modern Day Gadianton Golden Boy, now available in multiple eBook formats through the Smashwords Premium Catalog. Use coupon code YF32T before July 31, 2012. Enter the coupon code during checkout at

Friday, June 8, 2012

Youth Adrift by Ilyan Kei Lavanway for Friday Fictioneers 100-Word Micro-Fiction

I wrote the following story for the Madison Woods Friday Fictioneers. The weekly challenge is to write a 100-word flash fiction story based on the photo provided. It's fun, and it's great practice for anyone who enjoys writing.
Youth Adrift, Youth Adrift is a 100-word micro-fiction story posted on and entered into the Friday Fictioneers comments at

Royan kissed Aleka. Aleka’s lips were dry and cracked.

“How long has it been?” mumbled Aleka.

“Since I kissed a girl?”

“Since we’ve been adrift.”

“Three days.”

Hypoxia exacerbated the delirium of dehydration.

“It burns!” exclaimed Aleka, lifting her dress. An unnaturally large human jaw shaped hole exposed her femur.

“Thank you,” she said, about to cry.

“For what?”

“Hiding me in here, before, before,” she sobbed, gasping.

Royan held Aleka. She cried herself to sleep. She never awoke. A tear descended Royan’s sunburned cheek. He stared into the blue expanse. Glimpses of ground shimmered red beneath the stratus layer.


Follow the continuation, titled Dauntless, at

Monday, June 4, 2012

Teen Math Prodigy Shouryya Ray Solves 350-Year-Old Newtonian Particle Dynamics Mystery

Shouryya Ray, teenage math genius, solved 350-year-old Newton particle dynamics theories, Teen math prodigy, Shouryya Ray, is an India-born youth studying in Germany. He recently solved two particle dynamics theories posed by Sir Isaac Newton over 350 years ago. Modern scientists have considered the problems unsolvable.

This kid, 16-year-old Shouryya Ray, is awesome. He is one of many prodigious examples around the world, demonstrating a direct fulfillment of the biblical prophecy found in the Old Testament Book of Joel, Chapter 2, verses 28-32, particularly verse 28.

According to a May 27, 2012 International Business Times article by Ankita Mehta, titled Indian-Origin Boy in Germany Solves Newton's 350-Year-Old Math Problem, young Shouryya Ray was told during a field trip that a fundamental particle physics problem posed by Sir Isaac Newton 350 years ago was unsolvable. The kid could not believe there could be no solution, so he set about finding one. The kid was right. There is no reason to suppose that a solution does not exist just because nobody has found it for centuries.

Different subject, same concept. The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle is myopic and bogus. We subscribe to it because it is all we can discern with our current understanding. It is all we can calculate and observe with our current mathematics and instruments.

I refuse to believe that you cannot know both the precise location and the precise momentum of any given particle at any given moment. To suggest that such determinate precision is impossible is to deny God and say that he cannot keep track of his own handiwork. Such a notion is daft at best, if not downright blasphemous.

It would be far wiser and more humble to admit that there must be a way to precisely and simultaneously determine both the position and the momentum of any particle of matter, but we have not yet discovered how to do it. The best we can do so far involves sacrificing the precision with which one value is determined to more accurately determine the other value.

Now, don't go shouting that I'm a religious nut devoid of respect for science. As a servant of Jesus Christ, I have the utmost respect for science. Who do you think invented science in the first place? We haven't even tapped a fraction of a quark on the tip of the iceberg of science.

Two years ago, scientists suggested quantum memory may invalidate the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, or the principle of indeterminacy, as it is often called. An August 2, 2010 article at by Casey Johnston, titled Quantum memory may topple Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle supports the idea that the precise values of all attributes of matter at any given moment can be known simultaneously.

Look back through history. You cannot help but acknowledge that things once thought impossible were later proven possible and eventually became common knowledge among laymen.

Early proponents of visionary hypotheses risked and often lost life and limb for truths they could barely conceptualize in their minds, let alone prove empirically. History has vindicated many of them. Extrapolate your paradigm forward with an eternal perspective.

Do not assume that there is any such thing as a problem that cannot be solved. We have not discovered everything there is to discover. We do not yet have the whole picture in any discipline of science. We cannot even fully grasp the extent of the laws of physics at our Telestial level of understanding. How can we, as mortal men, expect to completely comprehend universes created by a Celestial God?

Matter can be organized into any conceivable form and endowed with any conceivable set of attributes. But not by Telestial means. Nor by Terrestrial means.

The layman can learn more about the universe in the temples of the LDS Church, that is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, than in any other institution of learning on the face of the earth. And it's free.

It would behoove you to find the Mormon missionaries and listen to them. Be baptized, and do whatever it takes to prepare yourself to go to the temple. You will never regret doing so.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Mormonism 101 Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

Aba Nigeria Mormon Temple, This is the LDS or Mormon Temple in Aba, Nigeria. The Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints has nearly 200 temples around the world. Temples are different than Sunday meeting houses, of which there are thousands. Temples are dedicated to special ceremonies such as eternal marriages, baptisma for the dead, and other sacred ordinances for both living and dead. Aba, Nigeria Temple of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

I just attended a Mormon stake conference in Rockledge, Brevard County, Florida. For those unfamiliar with Mormon terminology, the word stake refers to a geographical area that includes several congregations. Each congregation is called a ward. When Mormons refer to stake conferences, stake buildings, stake callings, and such, they are not talking about going out to eat at a restaurant that serves steaks.

Think of the Church as a huge tent. Stakes anchor the tent. There is a lot of symbolism in this simple concept.

One example comes to mind. Allow me to illustrate. The Church, like a tent, is exposed to the winds and tempests of the world. Winds of opposition and tempests of adversity cannot blow down the Church, because it is firmly anchored by its many stakes around the world, stakes that are planted firmly in the Gospel of Jesus Christ, which is as immutable as rock.

During this particular stake conference, mention was made of an online resource that may be helpful to you if you have ever wondered about the plethora of misconceptions and rumors floating around about Mormons and the LDS Church, that is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This online resource is Mormonism 101 FAQ.

Another place to find out what people are saying and how Mormons are responding is So, if you want to keep up with the latest gossip and rumors, at least add these websites to your repertoire.

Round out your perspective. If you want to know about Mormons, why not attend a Mormon sacrament meeting on Sunday and ask some Mormons what they are all about.

If you want to learn about cars, you ask a mechanic. If you want to learn about art, you ask an artist. If you want to learn about Mormons, why would you ask everybody but a Mormon? Mormons are not morons.